Arijana

Jul 18

See what your followers think of you.

BLACK = I would date you.
GREEN = I think you’re cute.
BLUE = You are my tumblr crush.
GREY = I wish you would notice me.
PURPLE = I don’t talk to you but I really love your blog.
TEAL = We have a lot in common.
YELLOW = I don’t know you at all.
ORANGE = I don’t like your blog.
BROWN = I don’t like you.
PINK = I think you are unattractive.
RED = I hate you with a burning passion.
WHITE = You scare me.
RAINBOW = BED PLZ.

Apr 02
rollsoffthetongue:

What’s so funny about this? Recognize the guy in the bed? Yep, it’s Mark Twain, the famous writer, in a photograph taken in 1897. That was a long time ago, but some things never change, whether you are rich and famous or poor and unknown, young or old, man or woman. We ALL need our sleep, and most of us get that sleep in bed. But some of us sleep a lot better and more than others. There can be many reasons and causes for not getting enough sleep. The joke tells us about one, having a bad back from an injury or just old age. But there can be many other reasons too, for example, having a bad mattress, having an illness, having too much stress and too many problems on your mind. You might have to work nights and your body can’t adjust to sleeping during the day. You might be burning the candle at both ends and partying all night long. If you can’t get deep rest to recover from the day’s physical, mental and emotional challenges, then you could be in all kinds of trouble. If you do a lot of physical labor, then your muscles need to relax and recover their strength and resiliency. If you work mostly with your brain and you don’t get enough sleep, then you start to lose your focus and concentration. People like doctors or subway motormen or aircraft controllers, MUST be able to concentrate. Other people’s lives depend on it. In the case of the joke, our hero’s inability to get deep rest is making him depressed. Did you catch the difference in stress and pronunciation in there? The first homophone is deep rest, the second one is dee-pressed. It’s all a question of stress ‒ in pronunciation and in bed. And THAT’s what’s so funny!
 
This joke came from Owen McMahon on facebook

Listen to my audioboo: https://audioboo.fm/boos/2042091-sleep-tight

rollsoffthetongue:

What’s so funny about this? Recognize the guy in the bed? Yep, it’s Mark Twain, the famous writer, in a photograph taken in 1897. That was a long time ago, but some things never change, whether you are rich and famous or poor and unknown, young or old, man or woman. We ALL need our sleep, and most of us get that sleep in bed. But some of us sleep a lot better and more than others. There can be many reasons and causes for not getting enough sleep. The joke tells us about one, having a bad back from an injury or just old age. But there can be many other reasons too, for example, having a bad mattress, having an illness, having too much stress and too many problems on your mind. You might have to work nights and your body can’t adjust to sleeping during the day. You might be burning the candle at both ends and partying all night long. If you can’t get deep rest to recover from the day’s physical, mental and emotional challenges, then you could be in all kinds of trouble. If you do a lot of physical labor, then your muscles need to relax and recover their strength and resiliency. If you work mostly with your brain and you don’t get enough sleep, then you start to lose your focus and concentration. People like doctors or subway motormen or aircraft controllers, MUST be able to concentrate. Other people’s lives depend on it. In the case of the joke, our hero’s inability to get deep rest is making him depressed. Did you catch the difference in stress and pronunciation in there? The first homophone is deep rest, the second one is dee-pressed. It’s all a question of stress ‒ in pronunciation and in bed. And THAT’s what’s so funny!

 

This joke came from Owen McMahon on facebook

Listen to my audioboo: https://audioboo.fm/boos/2042091-sleep-tight

Apr 02
mynameschai:

 
Mar 25
Mar 25
dogscan:


Okay no. Fucking no. You think your sandwich is cute with peanut butter and jelly hearts, fucker? Well you’ll change your mind once you put it together and try to eat it. First you’ll get a mouthful of just bread and disappointment, then when you take another bite your mouth will be assaulted by copious the amounts of sticky peanut butter and sugary jelly and there won’t be enough bread to save you from it. A sandwich like that is what failure tastes like. The pb and j may be shaped like hearts but there’s no love in that sandwich. It’s about balance. Life needs balance, and so does your fucking sandwich. You disgust me. Don’t talk to me until you know how to make a proper sandwich.

dogscan:

Okay no. Fucking no. You think your sandwich is cute with peanut butter and jelly hearts, fucker? Well you’ll change your mind once you put it together and try to eat it. First you’ll get a mouthful of just bread and disappointment, then when you take another bite your mouth will be assaulted by copious the amounts of sticky peanut butter and sugary jelly and there won’t be enough bread to save you from it. A sandwich like that is what failure tastes like. The pb and j may be shaped like hearts but there’s no love in that sandwich. It’s about balance. Life needs balance, and so does your fucking sandwich. You disgust me. Don’t talk to me until you know how to make a proper sandwich.

Mar 17

pupbutt:

why say nip slip when peek-a-boob is so much better

:O it isssss

Mar 17
dilfcomplex:

boys are so fucking dumb if you change your picture they think you’re a different person like even children have a better grasp of object permanence

dilfcomplex:

boys are so fucking dumb if you change your picture they think you’re a different person like even children have a better grasp of object permanence

Mar 17

bowlingalleymomma:

ourlifewithneo-x:

Some of these are real good, gonna have to try them. 

I love this

Mar 15

quote

German language suits heavy metal music. French might be the language of love, but German is the language of anger.

Oliver Riedel

(via linkandivan)

Mar 15

aggressive-zebra:

I don’t have a ”type”. If I like you, I like you.

And if I like you, you’re pretty special.

Because I hate everyone.